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20- AND IF YOU WISH TO REPLACE A WIFE WITH ANOTHER, AND YOU HAVE GIVEN ONE OF THEM A HEAP OF GOLD, DO NOT TAKE ANY OF IT.  DO YOU WANT TO TAKE IT UNJUSTLY AND A MANIFEST SIN.

21- AND HOW SHOULD YOU TAKE IT WHEN YOU HAVE GONE UNTO EACH OTHER, AND WE HAVE TAKEN FROM YOU A SOLEMN COVENANT.

There are the following points in these Ayahs:

1-    Allah the Highest is stressing the point that he has no right to the dowry he gave his wife if he wants to divorce her, regardless of how much he gave her, even if it was a heap of gold.  This will be an unjust act and manifest sin.

2-    There is no upper limit on the dowry, saying “AND YOU HAVE GIVEN ONE OF THEM A HEAP OF GOLD” indicates that there is no upper limit. 

It is reported that when Omar Ibn El- Khatab was Khalifa, he preached one day that women should not have more than 400 silver pieces as dowry, which is what Allah’s messenger prayer and peace upon him paid and what his daughters received for dowry.  A woman stopped Omar and reminded him of this Ayah, then Omar said: “May Allah forgives me, every one knows about the religion more than Omar”.

This is not a license for women to be over-demanding in their dowry or for men not giving their wives an appropriate dowry.  Allah’s messenger prayer and peace upon him said: “The most blessed marriage is the easiest in expense”.  (A: 6; 82 & D: Nekah; 31)

Also Allah’s messenger prayer and peace upon him said: “Of the signs that a woman is blessed, the ease of proposing to her, and ease of paying her dowry, and the ease of marrying her”. (A: 6; 77, 91)

Also there is no lower limit for the dowry.  It is well documented that Allah’s messenger prayer and peace upon him allowed the marriage of a man to a woman, and her dowry was teaching her some of the Quran, as he could not afford even an iron ring”.  (B: Nekah; 14 & M: Nekah; 76)

After the intimacy of marriage, we should not take back what we have given our wives, if he is the one who desire to divorce her.

The dowry is due in full once the marriage is consummated.  Omar Ibn El-Khatab and Ali Ibn Abi Taleb are reported to have said: “Once the door is closed and the cover is taken off, and what should not be seen is seen, the dowry will be due”.

After marriage, the man and woman would have seen what others do not see in each other and will show feelings and intimacy not like any they had with others. 

“AND WE HAVE TAKEN FROM YOU A SOLEMN COVENANT”

This is the bond of marriage and that it entails, or loyalty, tenderness affection, and privacy.  The covenants given from one to the other in marriage are solemn covenants, which should be observed and respected.

B: Bukhari    M: Muslim     Mal: Malek    A: Ahmed   D: Abu Dawood     

Da: Daremy       Ma: Ibn Magah            N: Nesae          T: Termezi